Jen

baby, you're a lost cause

Candidacy went well, I guess I can say. Though not well enough to make me get through it the first time. So ass clowns they were, and they are making me show my work again in a month.

I think I could accept it better if their reasons for showing work again made sense, but it really didn't. "We think you articluate your art well and your pictures explain what you are trying to say, we just think that this is a rather new way of photographing for you and we'd like to see more work in a month." I spent much too much time trying to get them to explain this to me better. I will produce more work in a month, regardless if they make me show it again. This I could not understand.

I'm not really bothered by the not passing thing as much as I am bothered by the fact that I have to go through all this stress AGAIN. How much does that suck? So as the tally goes, out of 7 people that have gone through this stupid act of candidacy, 3 have "passed" and 4 have to show again.

I also don't like all this bitterness that is welling up inside me about this school and it's politics. I know it's a common theme among graduate art students, or maybe grad students in general? I'm not sure. Nonetheless, candidacy has prepared me for nothing in real life- never will I have to be drilled by 12 "professional" photographers about why I do my work as I do. Getting picked up by a gallery or even a museum (this I know) only involves smaller person to person contact. I feel as if my peers and I have been put through an uneccessary hazing just to put some fear into us, and to see the real jealousy that exsists from these "professional" photographers of new talent.

So, thanks, everyone, for the support during the last couple of days. . .

The only positive thing that came out of this is that I won my bet - if I didn't make candidacy on the first round, Nate had to take me to Harry Potter. So you can guess how happily I spent the rest of my evening. : )

I am very much looking forward to Greg's show tonight, and seeing the lovely bunch of people that I get to spend my Thursday nights with. Who's gonna cheer me up?!

Well, the mailing list calls, and when it calls, I answer.