are you all you want? yes you are

long day going here. it's one of those days where i'm afraid to put my head down cause i might not lift it back up. thank god for winamp and heymay. rock.

i look like total hell today. i chose not to shower this morning to increase my sleep time. i haven't had a haircut in weeks, maybe months and i only had one shitty old sweater left at shorty's place. i look like a bum. especially compared to the girls in the leather boots that seem to populate my office. thankfully i just hide out in my office all day, so i thought i could get away with looking like shit. but of course today is the day that i get to ride on the elevator with the CFO. i know the square of carpet in the right hand corner of the middle elevator really well. i feel like quitting or knitting.

i found this really intersting quote in the last chapter of June Jordan's book On Call. She's writing about Black Vernacular English, more popularly ripped on as ebonics, and it's evolution and relevence to the lives of African-Americans. One of her students' cousin was killed by the cops in New York and his family was unable to get any information from the cops or a prosecution from the district attourney. She had him write an essay about his feelings on the whole subject and this is from that essay,

I believe that to a large degree, justice may only exist as rhetoric.

it's interesting because it seems to tie into the idea that justice is tied up in the language of the law which dispenses it. and it's only available to those who speak that language.

anyways, it's just an idea i was thinking about last night and today. it probably has a ton of holes in it, but at least it's something to ponder. later.